Saturday, March 1, 2014

February Highlights

This month's discoveries:

1. I have Kindleitis. If you're not familiar with this particular ailment, let me explain...It's when your hand (more specifically, the little nook between your thumb and first finger) gets sore from holding your Kindle. It's kinda like tendinitis, except for the Kindle. Get it?

I'm super-dee-duper hoping I can get my doctor to put me in the hospital for a week so they can run tests. You know, because I'm the first patient to be discovered with this sickness. Oh, and I need to make sure he puts me in a part of the hospital where visitors under the age of 18 aren't allowed. Maybe I'll send out a sign-up sheet for volunteers to come sit on my bed and hold my Kindle for me. I promise that Kindleitis isn't contagious. Maybe.

2. I noticed an add in a magazine for an "active sports bra". And I'm gonna be honest here, I don't get it. Well, the "active" part, I mean. I'm being for serious. I really am confused on how that kind of a bra works. If you have any idea or knowledge, please let me know. My curiosity is at high alert.

3. I had an ear infection a week or so ago. Good glory, that's some pain. I now have post traumatic stress that I didn't hold my babies more when they had infection after infection. Man, my bad parenting started earlier than I initially suspected.

4. On Valentine's Day, Child #2 came home from school, plopped down on the couch with a huff and just started talking. To me. Highly unusual.

"Mom! Did you know that Valentine's isn't even about love?!
It's just named after some stupid saint guy that got killed.
That's just dumb."

Oh, her innocence has been shattered. I wonder what will happen when she figures out that a woman feels most loved when her husband cleans the bathroom for her.

5. I had a dream the other night that I was shopping at the mall. I believe I was looking for a prom dress for Child #1. I remember that I was frustrated with how immodest the dresses were that I was looking at (even my subconscious is righteous!), so I left the store. As I was walking down the center walkway of the mall, I was approached and asked to be a model. My exact thoughts were, "Oh my gosh, I've been discovered!".

Clearly, I've gone beyond crazy and right into delusional.

6. And just for fun, just for smiles, I'm giving you the cutest cowgirls you ever did see. Aren't they just beautiful? They look just like me. I think it's the eyes.

Enjoy your weekend.
I hope you get discovered.

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