Sunday, September 27, 2015

Currently And A Few Clicks Over

Y'all. My baby is going on a mission.

Santa Rosa, California. Spanish speaking.
She will be serving for our church. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latterday Saints. 18 months. No family, no texting, no regular world life. Just teaching people about Jesus. In Spanish.

I'm a mix of emotions. Proud, awe, anxiety, love. All bundled into one.
But I had the most amazing peace settle over me as she read the words of her mission call. She is in the right time and the right place. It's amazing to watch.  She's such a beautiful example. I can't get over it.


I stumbled upon this the other day.
Click over here and check them out. Please. You won't be disappointed.

Naturally I offered to buy them for my college girl. Can't you just see her walking across campus in these? I've really thought about them all week. How does one accessorize such shoes?

Could we all buy them together? Wear them on Thursdays?


I just finished reading this book.
Another click, go over and take a look.

It's super lovely and a gentle reminder to slow down and let your soul breathe.
I highly recommend it. She's such a beautiful Christian writer.

The next book on my list is this. Have you read it?
Shall we read it together while wearing our gnome shoes?


Enjoy your Sunday.
Find time to do something that brings you joy.

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

For When Life Gets Real

So. There was a birthday. She's now 19.

And we went out to eat as a family. We sat down on a bench to take a picture and my thoughts whispered, "This is the last time for a while we can all sit together." And my soul got tight and my eyes got blurry.

And then we were off. Headed to Idaho. All the way from Texas. A 25 hour drive. Good times. No really, sometimes when you're stuck together, cramped in a small space, it can be great. Exhausting, but great.

We unloaded, unpacked, sorted and put away in her new dorm room. BYU Idaho is now her home.

We hiked through campus and bought her enough groceries to last 3 months. We ate dinner together, just one last time. I could barely swallow.

I've done hard things in my life. I held my dad's hand as he died. And saying goodbye to my daughter, my heart, was one of the hardest. Driving away and leaving her behind made me unravel. I gave myself a good 3 hours to lose it. And then I sucked in a breath and got it together.

Another 25 hour drive and we're back home again. But it's different now. There's a different feel to the house, a flow that's slightly off-kilter. We are now a home of 4. That's something to adjust to. At some point I'll walk in her room. Just not in the near future.

She's in a great place at a terrific time in her life. I'm excited for all she will see and do and how she will come into her own. My sister gave me the greatest advice that I have tethered myself to, "She is made for greater things. Now let her go do them." And so I will.

Monday, September 7, 2015

Beauty On A Sunday

These 3.
They are my very heartbeat.

Saturday, September 5, 2015

Oh, How I Need Her

My voice feels silent lately. And my heart. Because my head can't find a way to accept that I have a daughter leaving for college. Everything about that statement makes me sad. And I can't find a way to kick myself out of it.

The first day of school has come and gone. That's usually a milestone day for me. Not this year. Because only 2 walked out and back in those doors. It's always been 3. Always. I don't know how to handle it. My mother heart can't work it's way around this change.

I know it's time. For her to move on. But I can't seem to find a way to relax my grip on her. I want her here every day. For the rest of forever. I want to protect her, feed her and take care of her in all the ways it's always been. But that is not the plan.

The plan is to move forward in the journey. And I find myself at an impasse to let her move into her own space. I know it's the right thing to do, but I can't find the will to let it happen. I want to grab on to her with both hands and hold her so tight, she soaks into my skin. But then I remember she's already there. She always has been and always will be.

So I'm preparing my heart in all the ways I know how. To let her walk into her own journey. The one where she mans the boat all on her own. But boy, does my heart hurt just with the idea of it all. I knew this time would come, but I never expected it to be excruciating. How is a mother supposed to let part of her heart live so far away from home? It can be done, I guess. It's just the doing part that tests my limits of bravery.

May we see these children of ours. With eyes that know only their beauty. Because they are a gift. Even on those bad days. Especially on the rough ones. This is what I was made for. Right here, right now. To have these 3 daughters stitched into the very fabric of my soul. To let them light my way in all their extraordinary ways.

We mother on. No matter where they live or how long the distance. They hold our heart right where they are. Forever. That's the truth I'm grasping on to. The hope that let's the future play out as it may. Hold tight to those you love. And they'll hold you right back. Their love will keep you standing.

Friday, August 14, 2015

How To Have A Bad Day

It's been a bad week. Worse than normal. Monday through Wednesday I had a personal pity party. Here's how to have a really crappy day(s):

It first starts with a Jury Summons in the mail. Good grief, that piece of paper is annoying.

You drive downtown, which is always fun. The exit you're supposed to take is under construction, so you find yourself directed onto another freeway. You say lots of prayers. Out loud. And weave around downtown until you find the Courthouse.

You notice a convenient parking lot across the street. So, you pull in to take a look.
A man knocks on your window giving you his parking pass. He's paid for the space for the entire day and he's leaving early. You count your blessings and full uber lucky to this man. You park in his spot.

Jury Evaluation takes for-ev-er. Because, it just does. And count your lucky stars, you get picked to be on the jury. Good gracious, my insides were crying when that happened. You watch all the other lucky humans leave who didn't get picked.

At the end of the long, boring day, you walk to your car.
Only to find a boot on your tire and a Warning sticker that you didn't pay for the parking spot.
Time stands still and you just have a moment. Right there in downtown Houston.

You call the Boot Company and it takes them 25 minutes to get to you.
You explain, "The space was paid for. That gentleman was being so nice. I don't understand."
Boot man is patient, even when I grab his arm and start jumping up and down with dramatics. And then he takes the time to explain why I'm naive. Super.

He then tells me that I owe $133.25 to get the Boot removed. After catching my breath, I told him he'd have to call The Husband to let him know. He declined. And also tells me I should be grateful my car didn't get towed. Awesomeness. I wonder to myself if the $6 a day jury payment will cover this enormous parking charge.

He swipes my card and I'm on my way into the rush hour traffic of Houston.
20 minutes later, each of my kids is calling me with some kind of complaint. By the time Child #2 calls because she's mad at her dad, I lose it. I start crying.
Child #2 gets all sorts of alarmed and can't figure out how to get me to stop. She finally tells me that I probably just need to go to bed.

Dinner and chocolate calmed me down some.
Just slightly.
Because I still had to go back for the next 2 days. It was grueling.
But this time, I made The Husband drive me. My parking days are over.

Saturday, August 8, 2015

Something To Make

You know me. I redecorate my mantel often. Sometimes it stays for a while, but rarely. I usually switch it up every few weeks. Here's what we've got for August:

Do you see that clothespin wreath? Isn't it adorable?!
You can find the original and the directions HERE.
You must make it. Really. It took me about 45 minutes. And just an FYI- it's heavy. Hang with care.

Enjoy your weekend.
Be creative :)

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Stuff On A Wednesday

1. We had Sister's Day. It was August 1st. It's our family tradition we started long ago to celebrate the beauty of having sisters. This is the first time it's fallen on a Saturday, so we let The Dad join us. Sister's Day turned into Family Day. Which is always my favorite way to spend time. We went to lunch and then a movie. Just the 5 of us. Together. The best.

And just an FYI- Child #1 cut off 15 inches of her hair. Now she looks like a preppy college girl.

2. Child #2 is now an official driver. Technically she's been driving for years. Now we just get to pay more for our car insurance.

3. I had one major goal this summer. To create a family art project. It's something I've wanted to do for years, and I finally bribed/threatened/begged everyone to cooperate.

I bought a huge frame from Goodwill and painted it. Then I purchased watercolor poster board/paper from Hobby Lobby and cut it to the size of the frame. I used a ruler to mark off the grid.

Each family member was assigned a time to paint squares. There were no rules, except to use the paint colors I had picked out. Once everyone was finished, I filled in the remaining open spots. It's now my favorite piece of art in the house.

4. I've been walking in the mornings. Every summer I get this idea that I need to get it together and be more active. So, I walk. During the hottest months of the year. It makes no sense.

Every morning I pass this tree.

It's losing it's leaves. In the middle of summer. It's got the seasons all mixed up. Leaves aren't supposed to fall until, you know, Fall.

I can't help but compare myself to this tree. I feel like I'm always doing things in the wrong order, usually at the wrong time. The opposite of normal. Do you ever feel that way? That the world is moving to a rhythm that you just can't seem to match?

Most of the time I count it off as just me being abnormally strange. But every morning when I look at this tree, I wonder if it really even matters. So what if it's losing it's leaves in the wrong season. It's still a beautiful tree doing it's thing right along with all the others.

And so I wonder if doing your own thing, no matter the season, really is what it's all about. Regardless of those around us. We're still our own beauty. Maybe more so because we're going against the grain. Weird is the new normal. At least I believe it is.

Let's learn a lesson from the leaf-falling tree. Be who you are. No matter what surrounds you. Now matter what the world tells you. Do your thing and be uniquely beautiful.

Words to remember.

Happy random Wednesday, friends.