Where's The Middle Man?

If you look up the phrase, 'Vicious Cycle' in the dictionary, this is what you will find:

I make a list of all the food I need to buy.
I clean out the fridge in the process and throw away all the old food.
I traverse the isles of the grocery store and buy new food.
I hall all the bags of food into the house.
I replace all the old food with new food in the fridge and pantry.
The kids open the pantry and exclaim, "There is nothing to eat!"
Then the kids complain, "Why don't you ever buy Pop Tarts!? Everyone else's mom buys Pop Tarts!"
I pull all the food back out of the fridge and cook dinner.
I clean up the leftover food and the dishes it briefly touched.
I walk out of the kitchen.
I hear a child cry, "I'm hungry!"

Am I missing something here? Is there a step I've missed or a loop hole I haven't found? When I sat in the auditorium on my college graduation day, this is certainly not what I envisioned. Not even close.