20% Mine

Sam has been asking me for weeks to come and eat lunch with her. The first time she offered up the idea, I was a little stunned. "Do other parents come eat lunch at your JUNIOR HIGH?" I asked. She responded, "of course, and they always bring McDonald's".

So, today we ate lunch. I sat with her and her giggling friends in a monstrous cafeteria filled with 6th graders. She pointed out the 'hot' boy she sits by and the mean girl that is 14 yrs. old and still in 6th grade. I watched her interact with her friends and use way too many eye rolls and animated hand movements. I have to admit, I even told her friends some embarrassing stories about her.

As lunch ended she gave me a kiss and a hug and then disappeared into a sea of backpacks. I watched as she was swallowed into the hallway. As she walked away I realized that she is 80% teenager and 20% mine. She argues and talks back and has an attitude that could stun a gorilla. But underneath all of that she is still willing to ask me to come to her junior high and eat lunch, and then give me a kiss on the way out.

I'm not sure how long the 20% will stick around. Some days it looks like it has vanished under her eye shadow. Then there are other days where she sits by me on the couch and rests her head on my shoulder. Those moments sustain me through the endless crying and "It's not fair!!"

But, what if she thinks the same thing about me? 80% of the time I'm downright annoying and strict. 20% of the time I'm likable. Which can't be right, because, let's just be honest here, I'm never annoying. Maybe a little grating. But never annoying. And at the end of the day, as I look at my first born, all I really see is 100% love. She gets all of it, for always.