Monday, January 20, 2014


Art created by Child #2

It's a holiday. And it's actually one I like. Why? Because The Husband has the day off as well. He gets the privilege of running interference with the offspring.

I woke up thinking about Martin Luther King having a Dream. It was a lovely one. Big and bold. So, I've decided to dream today too. Also big and bold. Go big or go home, and all that stuff.

My Top 10 World-Changing Dreams:

1. Congress should ban the wearing of leggings on anyone over the age of 6.
And jeggings? Oh, for the love. They shouldn't even exist.

2. Anyone wanting to use glitter has to take a course and get certified. All glitter needs to be kept 'behind the counter' and you must show your 'concealed glitter license' in order to purchase and carry glitter on your person.

3. The food pyramid needs to be tipped upside down.
Vegetables are stupid. Sugar is supreme. Enough said.

4. School should be all year. No breaks. Ever. Well, 3 days for Christmas. That's it.
It will be like having your kids at boarding school. Just cheaper because they "board" at your own house. This is a seriously genius idea.

5. If we have the technology to put a human in space, then we definitely have the means of creating a "Sass Zapper". Anytime your teenager rolls their eyes or gives you sass, they get a little jolt of electricity. Kinda like a taser. Holy moly, mothers everywhere would snatch these up speedy quick.

6. All cars should have limousine windows installed. All of them. Then, when you don't want to listen to the crazy going on behind you, the window goes up. And let's be real here, the window would pretty much always be up.

7. All ugly or stupid t-shirts should be banned (unless you wear them to do yard work). I'm thinking that a national committee could be formed to decide which ones should become extinct.

8. All texting needs to use proper grammer. I'm seriously concerned that teenagers everywhere are growing up not knowing how to spell. I'm not even going to mention how I feel about acronyms being used when you're speaking out loud. Actually saying "LOL" is so very, very not cool. It needs to stop.

9. Every Friday should be Craft Day.
Maybe the work week should only be 4 days. That way everyone could Craft.
Well, except the children. They have to go to school. No exceptions.

10. Wives and Moms are always right.
Congress needs to pass this law. Can't you see how much easier everyone's lives would be if this one teny-tiny law was put in place?
I think this one deserves a t-shirt.

I hope you do your own dreaming today....

1 comment :

Addie Ashton said...

Amen on the leggings! I wore them when they were popular in the early 90's, but soon realized that they were a mistake. Must we go through that again?