Monday, August 4, 2014

How We Trip

What is it with Vacation Hangover? It's like, the longer you're gone, the longer it takes to catch back up with regular life. You hear what I'm sayin'? We've been home a week and I'm still not back up to speed.

Do you remember how I told you we spent 3,843 hours on the road? That's one epic road trip. We didn't plan for it to be epic, it just organically happened. We were driving to Utah, which led to San Diego, which led to Disneyland, which led to Universal Studios. Crazy, right?

But, the road trip part? That's where some of the best magic happened. I'm going to give you some of our highlights. Disneyland gets it own post. Why? Because it's Disneyland. My heart misses that place so bad.


1. On Day 2 of our driving sprint, we hit cabin fever. Car fever? Confined space with your family fever? First we hooked up Child #1's phone to the car speakers and blasted music. As I scrolled through her play list, I discovered this child has over 900 songs on her iphone. Say to the what? Let me spell that out. Nine hundred! I don't even have that many acorns.
We stopped for gas and we switched phones and music. The Husband set us up with songs from the 80's. Epic. Guess who sang along? Just me and the Hubbster. Guess who whined the whole time? The offspring. So, to make the situation even more spectacular, we danced. Todd and I. For legit. He did 'The Sprinkler' (while driving, he's got mad skills) and I did 'The Robot'. There are no words for the awesomeness of that moment. Our kids probably need therapy.

2. While passing a casino, The Favorite Baby Child said, "Hey. Let's go to the casino. I know how to gamble, because I watched it on Full House." Oh, bless her heart.

3. While walking through Downtown Disney, on our way into the park, we discussed death and roller coasters. We are just the kind of parents that find that stuff hysterical. We took quite a while to analyze who would be the most likely to fall out and die. Child #3 was the winner. She's the tiniest, so we figured she'd fly right out. A few minutes later, #3 made a statement, "Why can't I remain and Kellie go dead?" We considered her offer valid and made note.

4. Lots of family time. Which means forcing the children to all sit together and take pictures. I love, love, love it.

5. Child #2 walked into a sliding glass door. That was closed. She bounced off. She also decided to order a glass of chocolate milk through room service. We let her have at it and pay for it herself. Imagine her shock when the $3.45 price on the menu turned out to be $10 room service and delivery price. She drank her milk and said, "Now I don't have as much money for my Michael Kors bag!"
When she wasn't drinking chocolate milk, she drank loads of this disgusting lemonade/herbal tea totally gross drink. Towards the end of our trip, I kept buying it for her just so she would stop saying, "I want to go home!"

6. Child #1 carries her journal with her most of the time. It's actually pretty impressive. One day, while in the car, she decided to re-read a lot of her entries. Once she finished, she said, "I can't believe I wrote all this stuff. I think I may be getting dumber."

7. Lots of selfies on this this trip. Family and otherwise...
In this picture, we are sitting in a park by the beach. We sat in this exact park 12 years earlier when we only had Daughters 1 and 2. We also picked up lunch from the same place we ate 12 years ago. Total cool moment. But then I decided to rip up my bread and throw it on the ground near us. Pigeons came from everywhere! Child #2 started screaming and asking me to stop. So I threw out more bread.

8. We went to the beach. Fully clothed.

Child #2 loathes the sand. So she sat on a rock. For an hour. Texting her friends.

9. While at Legoland, Child #1 made us all rehearse crazy expressions and then required us to pose at the camera level on the roller coaster. This is scrapbook worthy, for sure. Maybe our Christmas card?

10. We found a 7-11 in San Diego. We haven't had a real, official Slurpee in 7 years. This was a serious moment of reverence.

11. Going into this trip, the only, and I mean only, thing Child #1 wanted, was a picture with Elsa and Anna. This girl was more excited to see the princesses then when she was 5. It was delightful to watch.

So, guess what I did, because I'm Super Mom? I stood in the Elsa/Anna line for 3 hours. Let me say that slowly. Three. Hours. Everyone else rode the Matterhorn and ate breakfast. Halfway into my roast-in-the-heat experience, I remembered that I've had skin cancer 3 times. So clearly, I'm a moron. Or I'm trying my darnedest to make a 17 year old girl happy.
Once we walked out, with signatures tucked away. I told this child she's getting a tattoo of my name somewhere on her person. Like, her entire right arm.

12. And here are some of my faves. Moments that I caught at random, but now feel beyond magical.

Enjoy your Monday, people.

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