Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Useless Information

I have no idea why I feel the need to share personal information today, but I do. Maybe it's because my brain is exhausted and it hurts to think too deeply. So naturally, I'm thinking about myself. That speaks volumes.

1. I'm obsessed with puzzles. Have been for some time. I've tried to psycho-analyze my new obsession. Is it because puzzles are logical and every piece has a place? Maybe. But it's probably more along the lines of, 'if-I-work-on-a-puzzle-I-can-avoid-all-the-crap-I-should-be-doing'. Yep. That sounds about right.

2. I dust my washer and dryer. Yes, yes I do. Every Tuesday after kid laundry. Please don't think I'm joking.

3. In the first half of my life, I was a dancer. You know, before I started having kids and crying all the time. For my first 20 years, I can't remember a time when I wasn't dancing. I once wore a bra so stacked with padding, my own parents couldn't recognize me. True story.

4. I'm an unconventional parent. I've come to terms with it. I think. My kids hardly ever do chores. I have been known to serve cookie dough for dinner. EVERY topic is an open conversation, especially if it's inappropriate.

5. The only parental goal I have is--I hope they don't end up in jail. If I set low expectations, I just might end up pleasantly surprised. It's a win-win.

6. I don't like odd numbers. I know I've discussed this before, but I find it worth mentioning again. Because really, this is one of the Top 10 things that makes me super weird. I am currently an even number in age. This brings peace to my soul. Really. My birthdays when I turn an odd number? Not a pretty sight.

7. Child #2 has discovered MASH. She has MASHed all the members of the family and her favorite school/choir teacher.
Apparently, I'm going to live in a mansion with 3 kids, while I'm married to Todd (I was really hoping for Vin Diesel, but whatever). I'll be a nerdy construction worker that drives a smart car, has a pet rat and no money. What a lovely future to look forward to. I think it's time to buy a new puzzle.

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