Questions For The Day

When I ask her why she has the inability to pick anything up off the floor, she tells me she "has a system". So this morning I stand and stare, and stare some more, and try to understand how exactly she functions in here. Is there a hidden clue I'm missing? Because I'm confused. What exactly is this system called? Teenage lazy?

When one receives 4 pounds, (yes, 4 pounds!) of See's chocolates for Mother's Day, do you think that person could eat every last morsel within 24 hours (because said person is known to be an overachiever)? And if so, how much weight would one gain? I mean, it's 4 pounds of chocolate. So, you would only gain 4 pounds, right? Because that's kindof a no-brainer. Breakfast, lunch, dinner. Done.