First up. I love you people. Truly. Who knew ya'll had such strong feelings about the Walmart. Your comments touched my softy heart. I feel like we're a united front. Am I going to change where I shop? Nope. I just love that I can complain to you, and you back me up. We're now BFF's.
On to other things...
I've started walking on my treadmill. It's been 3 days. I loathe it. And by loathe, I mean full blown hate. Exercise is evil. It ranks right up there with glitter. It's just bad. But my 'After 40' body is just not nice to me. I really don't get it. I mean, once you've survived to 40, shouldn't you get some kind of reward? Like, eating lots of cake without consequences? It's a cruel joke, I tell you. If you're currently living in a 'Before 40' body, live it up.
My treadmill faces this picture that hangs on the wall. It's what I've stared at for the last 3 days. Child #1 painted it 14 years ago. Isn't it awesome? I do wonder why we don't have any arms. Oh, and she painted herself really big and her sisters really small. So sweet.
I've realized several things as I've looked at this painting. First off, my mom was right (darn it!). Time does go by too quickly. When I had little ones, I never believed that saying. But now that my oldest is applying to college, I totally get it.
It's tempting to wish the time back, just so I could do it all differently. That's a rather natural way to think. But not very realistic. Because, aren't we all just doing the best that we can? In any given moment? I know I am. I bet you are too.
I think the problem rests on the fact that we so often feel like our best just isn't good enough. We look back, or even around at our present, and all we can see are the things we're doing wrong. We forget to notice all that we're doing right.
Because doing your best, with what you know and where you are, is really the only true way. It's not perfect because it's not supposed to be. Do we get it wrong? All the time. It's the way of things. It's what propels us to keep on trying. Right?
My 'After 40' body may not be kind to me, but my 'After 40' mind sure is. It's learned a lot. And it's a lot less likely to cast judgement than it used to be. It's also made me realize we got this. We really do. One day at a time. One family drawing after another.
This year, let's be kind to ourselves. Let's not wish it all away or wonder about a do-over. Let's do our best. With where we are. And who we are. And these imperfect people that we love perfectly.
That sounds like the very best kind of year.
(Without the treadmill.)