Wednesday, December 17, 2014

A Burning Question

Before you even ask, yes. Yes, I painted the acorns. And they are so rockin' my world. I can't even tell you how much I love them. A friend brought them to me from her yard. That's love for you, my homies. And let me just say, them tiny, little nuts are a little tricky to coat. Worth. Every. Minute.

But listen, there's a little nugget of questions whirling around in my brain. And I just have to get them out. M'kay?

I went to the mall yesterday.

Let's pause here for a sec....because the mall at Christmas is not my fave place.

I'd been putting it off for a while. It was a 'must happen today' moment. I geared up for it. I saved 5 different tasks for this one trip. My arms grew weary from carrying all the bags. Which is totally ridiculous.

So, here's my question that I just have to ask. Ready?

What is it exactly about Christmas that screams Hickory Farms beef log? Really. Why does this little kiosk pop up during this holiday? I mean, come on, beef and cheese that does not require refrigeration? Is that wise? I don't get it. Do people really buy this stuff? And if so, where does one take it? Personal use or party fare? Do you see where I'm going? So many questions.

Oh, and just for giggles, I noticed that they also sell mints. In pastel colors. Say what? Since when do happy holidays start with beef logs? What am I missing?

And on a side note, I've come up with a genius idea. Because, of course.

Every mall shopper needs to be assigned a cheerleader. Bam. Awesome.

Remember when Child #1 used to be a runner? There were times I would jog along side her (Let's be serious, it wasn't very far. I'm allergic to exercise.) and cheer her on. You know, pump her up to keep going. That kind of thing.

Every mother shopping during the Christmas season needs one of those cheerleaders. Someone to walk along side her and stand in the holy mess long lines with her. "You can do this." I'm telling you. We mothers need this. It might be life changing.

But, beef logs?
Not so much.

Happy Holidays.

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