Monday, February 27, 2012

The Quiet Stillness

Have you ever tried to define Peace? To give it a tangible, physical form? I'm not quite sure it's possible. I don't even know if there is a way to describe it. Peace feels slippery. Something that's out there and hard to hold on to.

Maybe a definition is hard to come by because Peace looks different for every person. If I'm being honest, Peace boils down to me getting my way. Every time. It's the house being clean, and staying that way for more than 23 minutes. It's quiet. It's the absence of money worries. It's children who behave and a husband who automatically knows what I'm thinking. Is all that Peace? Not only is it NOT peace, it's not realistic.

But my mind can't let go of my made-up version. I want everything in order, at the right time and done the right way. Once that happens, then Peace will coat my world pretty. It waits in the wings until my life is perfect, and then it can make an entrance. Not a moment before.

My definition of Peace isn't working. Not a shocking revelation. It doesn't take a genius to figure that out. Unrealistic ideas generally produce zero results.

What if my perception needs changing? Peace stays the same, always has, always will. But what if I've been looking for it to be defined by all the wrong things? What if Peace is the starting point instead of the final wrap up? What if Peace could exist right along side the noisy, messy, stressful and failure? Hmm. That kind of Peace sounds like something I can hold tight to.

There is a quiet stillness that comes with Peace. Most days, I tend to try and demand that quiet to come from everything and everyone that surrounds me. But, maybe Peace can only grow from the inside out. Maybe it doesn't respond to demands. And maybe the quiet only settles deep when I let my soul be still.

That kind of peace has little to do with my children's behavior or the state of my bank account. And everything to do with me. Not the outside me, but the inside me. That kind of peace, the kind that can still me long enough to see with better eyes, can most definitely paint my world pretty.

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