Monday, May 4, 2015

Learnings on a Monday

I feel like I'm on a learning curve lately. I'm not sure what it is. But my life feels like it's pointing things out to me. And some of it I don't like. But the other stuff is kinda cool. Here's what I've learned:

1. Flowers make me happy. This flower in particular. Why? Because I bought this plant for The Husband last year for his birthday. And let me tell you, that man is a toughie to buy for. But this plant? He loves it. So every time I look at it, which is every day, I feel like I nailed it. Somehow this hydrangea makes me feel like a rock star. For all of 4.3 seconds until one of my teenagers opens her mouth. And then I'm reminded that I'm a loser.

2. Speaking of being a loser. I stumbled onto one of those "Top 7 Things You Shouldn't Be Doing As A Parent" articles. And guess what? I'm doing 5 out of the 7. I told The Husband that I don't do anything half way. If I'm going to fail as a parent, at least I git r' done at full speed.

3. Child #2 might be a little deranged. Well, more than I initially suspected. Because it's Love Bug season here in Texas. And these pesky fly like creatures are everywhere. And there's always 2 stuck together. You know, because they're married. Well, Child #2 informed us over the weekend that she likes to pull the Love Bugs apart. "So they can't love each other anymore." And then she giggled.

4. I'm a cookie snob. Truly. I have a recipe that is divine. I can make it with my eyes closed. And the cookies? I've never tasted better. Ever. But lately I've seen "Monster Cookies" all over internet land. So, I picked a random recipe and made them. Ya'll, you better sit down for this. They're tasty. Peanut butter, chocolate chips and M&Ms? Yes please. I may have found a new addiction.

5. My sister-in-law called me to ask my advice on medicating her child with a migraine. Listen up, Homies. I know my pills. I really do. I know what to take when and with or without food. I know how to fix every ailment you've got. I'm so serious. I should have been a pharmacist instead of a stay-at-home mom. I bet my kids would have turned out way better if they had gone to daycare. But really. Nothing gives me a better rush than when someone asks me what pills to take. It's like my full brain turns on and gets really happy. So, basically, call me when you're sick. I won't even charge you.

6. Have I ever mentioned that one of my life's dreams is to drive a race car? It's true. And guess what I've discovered? There's a certain section of freeway by my house that is rarely populated at 10:30 am. And if one so chooses, she can drive really, really, and another really, fast. And she almost feels like she's in a race car. Almost. Don't mention this to Todd.

Peace Out on a Monday, friends.

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