I sat in a waiting room this week. That's it's own special kind of torture. At the exact moment I realized I was the only individual under the age of 70 in the room, everyone started talking about their pets. Like names, ages, all that good stuff. For reals. Iphones were passed around so we could all look at pictures.
After the pictures, came the advice. All eyes trained on me because again, I'm under the age of 70. I was first told that I need a dog. That just made me choke on my saliva. Even when I insisted that my kids are too lazy for a dog, I was reassured that a pet would teach them responsibility (not even a miracle from heaven could do that). One woman told me to make sure I'm not my children's friend. "Be their mother!", she stated. She even shook her finger to make her point. That was the moment I started giggling. Honest to goodness giggling.
The craziness continued right into my car where I turned on the radio to hear a guy describe his drunk driving episode with a lisp. My giggling turned into full blown hysterics. Have you ever heard someone explain a DUI with a lisp? I have no words. When I didn't think I could laugh anymore, the interviewer asked the man to say, "Sally sells seashells by the seashore." I started crying and hyperventilating at the same time.
Later that night, after dinner, my sister relayed that her 4 yr. old was telling my kids about her class guinea pig. When she told them that he's black, Child #3 said calmly, "We shouldn't say he's black. We should say he's African American." And just like that, with the visual of an African American guinea pig, I'm undone. I honestly can't handle the funniness. I have to bend over double just to hold it all in. I'm laughing so hard, I'm sweating. I'm either really pathetic, or my life is just crazy on all levels. It's probably a whole lot of both.
Find the funny. That's the goal. My life can't possibly be the only one this ridiculous. Right?
1 comment :
So that means my desk is an african american too. wow, good to know. I would have been embarrassed had I told someone my desk was black. So funny!
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